Clash of the plaids

This afternoon Luke wanted to play out side.  Since the temperatures have been well over 95 and the concrete thoroughly preheated, I insisted that he wear shoes if he wanted to go out there.  The trick was he had to go get them himself because, come on, I was on the couch knitting.  FINALLY he realized that I meant it when I said "YOU go get some shoes so you can play out side." and he ran off only to bring back his Sunday leather loafers. 

Darn.  I meant for you to get some flip flops.  No?  You can't read my mind, my dear almost 2 year old?  Okay.  My fault.

So I praised him and told him good job and that he got shoes and kiss kiss kiss, but then I gently broke the news that he needed socks to go with those shoes.  Once again he ran off, and once again he didn't get what I had in mind.  He brought back his purple and green argyle socks.  Which led to and ensemble that looked like this. 

Would you like to see that again? 

Oh yeah.  That's my baby boy.  It's very reminiscent of this outfit that also went horribly wrong. 

Did you see that blue cup up in the first picture?  That's a brand new cup that I gave him this morning, with a new type of lid.  It doesn't have a spout or a straw to suck on, just a hole in the lid.  When I gave it to him, he held it up to his mouth like a regular cup with no lid, expecting his milk to just come right on out.  When it didn't, he looked at it very confused, shook it up several times, and then tried again.  Poor baby.  I had to tell him through my giggles that he still had to suck a little bit to get the milk out. 

Once he was finally outside, he decided that the garden hose needed to come inside.  So as I'm still on the couch knitting, I look over and see this.

Can you see the giant puddle of water that gushed from the hose?  The puddle that took 24 PAPER TOWELS to clean up?  Not even kidding.  I for real counted. 

Once everything was clean I rounded up Luke's cup and my purse and we went to have dinner with Ashley (my sister, not Kayden's mom).  Mmmmmm....sushi on the patio.  Except I win the worst Mom award ever, because I forgot to order Luke something for dinner.  Again.  Our four rolls came out and there was nary a bite for him to eat.  Which meant I had to run in and order the most expensive kid's meal I've ever seen.  $8!  For a kid's chicken with fries and rice!  Price gouging when  mother is desperate it just wrong.